This month, we’re celebrating International Nurses Day and International Day of the Midwife by shining a light on the incredible work of nurses, midwives and care workers in our community.
One of those is ANMF and Nurses & Midwives Health member, Emmanuel.
As a perianesthesia nurse, Emmanuel uses empathy to comfort patients at their most vulnerable. However, he is fully aware that caring so deeply leaves him at risk of burnout. Below, Emmanuel shares his learnings on balancing care with self-care.
It’s an honour to share his story as we celebrate our nurses, midwives and care workers this May (and every day!).
Emmanuel is a people person. He cares. It’s just who he is.
So perianesthesia nursing – spending much of his time caring for patients who are asleep – may not seem an obvious choice. But any assumptions around this melt away when he starts talking about his work.
“People sometimes joke about it, saying ‘Oh, you’re not really doing too much, are you? You’re looking after patients while machines do all the work’,” he grins.
“I think it’s an important role,” he adds softly.
We are not machines
Emmanuel has an instinct for soothing a patient’s nerves before they’re wheeled into theatre, whatever that looks like for them.
He’s equally sensitive to his colleagues’ wellbeing. It’s not that uncommon, he says, to find one in a corridor blinking back tears. Or being uncharacteristically snappy one day – a stereotypical ‘grumpy nurse’.
It could be down to any number of things, he supposes. Perhaps work-related, perhaps not. Probably a combination of things.
“We’re not machines,” he says. “We’re human beings. Just like the people we’re treating. When it gets really hard, you have to reflect on that and be okay with it.”
It’s easier to make peace with your humanity these days, he reflects. “Hospitals are mostly onto it now. It’s a lot more common to talk about it. Talking about your feelings isn’t looked down upon.”
Off-switch not included
Still, protecting his own wellbeing is a perennial challenge for Emmanuel.
“I’m an empath,” he admits. “One of my downsides is that I can’t switch off from the people around me. I was that student in class who would see a schoolmate struggling, sit down next to them and ask: ‘do you want help with this?’.
“That’s who I’ve always been. It’s hard to ignore suffering. I don’t believe in leaving people behind. This comes at a cost to me as well. I’m very much aware of it.”
Awareness is one thing, taking necessary action is another. It can be incredibly difficult to accept that (sometimes) the most rewarding work comes at too high a price.
Personal protocols
Just as surgical teams have protocols to deal with adverse events, self-care plans should merit equal consideration. Having tried-and-tested strategies at your fingertips may be a game-changer when you’re tired and wired from a demanding shift.
Unsurprisingly, human connection is a big part of Emmanuel’s mitigation plan. “I try to keep in touch with people who aren’t in my field to see what they’re going through, and how life is,” he says. “I’ve got friends who are fathers and husbands. I try to spend time with them and learn how they’re getting through it – you know?”
He does his best to maintain fitness. “It’s much harder to get up and go to the gym at 4am in winter though. It takes a lot of effort,” he laughs. “I’m not a winter person!”
Opportunities for kindness
Emmanuel has found what works for him, most of the time. He’s developed the self-awareness to know when it’s not working. And he proves that protecting himself isn’t indulgent but essential.
Anyone feeling shame or guilt about prioritising their wellbeing may like to consider this pearl of ancient wisdom, courtesy of Seneca: “Wherever there is a human being there is an opportunity for kindness”.
As one of those human beings, looking after yourself is nothing more than showing yourself the same kindness you extend to others.
Emmanuel’s story is a reminder of the compassion, dedication and humanity that you – our nurses, midwives and care workers – bring to your work every day. As we mark International Nurses Day and International Day of the Midwife, we celebrate you and the role you play in supporting our communities.
For more information on Nurses & Midwives Health, visit their website.
